I'm In L.A. Trick!

Hi, I'm back to chat about my fancy L.A. weekend! Oh, and the title of this blog refers to a song that Jessica introduced me to... listening to it on the radio, whilst in L.A. was so fetch (sorry, we watched Mean Girls in L.A!)

So, I guess my L.A. extravaganza started at the airport when I received three rapid-fire, stalkerish messages from Mark, asking if I was by a Cosi and holding a UBurger bag. That crazy guy had shown up to surprise me before I left, though he couldn't get through security, resulting in a semi-dramatic movie airport scene in which we stood, double doors (opened by a security guard) between us. It was like Field of Dreams...though I'm fairly certain I wouldn't have aged if I'd stepped through the door; it just would've been a biotch to get back through security. Anyway, after a few awkward I love you's (some security guards are so nosy!) Mark left (and saw Ben Affleck on the T- WHAT??) and I flew to L.A. trick! I don't actually know what that means.

My flight was uneventful...had a BM (sup Bekka?), watched He's Just Not That Into You (if you can read the title, skip the movie!) and slept. The only notable instance was when the window-seat man to my left excused himself to go to the bathroom. As I stood in the aisle waiting for him to climb out, I awkwardly announced that I had to go too and hoped he "didn't mind if I followed him to the bathroom!" He smiled nervously and didn't talk to me for the rest of the flight. I guess some people don't like being assigned Bathroom Buddies anymore.

Jessica picked me up at the airport and, after an appropriate amount of screaming and hugging and I can't believe you're/I'm in L.A.'s, we headed to Santa Monica! We first walked on the Santa Monica pier with the rest of the hoodlums, opting for chatter and wacky pictures rather than flirting and drug deals (just this once), and then settled in at Yankees, a giant sports bar, for a drink. I suavely attempted to pay for a five dollar beer with one dollar (I've never been good at math) and we hung out for awhile, grabbing sushi from an all-night healthy convenient store on the way home!!! I love L.A.

I'm sorry but Saturday, guys, was SO much fun. First we went to this huge designers market held in the penthouse of a huge building in downtown L.A. It was awesome; people were selling clothes, earrings, kid stuff, bags, accessories...a bunch of funky stuff. AND they had a DJ, food and free wine and PBR. You really can't top shopping with a buzz- am I wrong?! Jessica and I got earrings, shirts (hers is western and mine has a lady with an afro on it!) and some other stuff and then headed to Hollywood Blvd. for some more shopping at that "amazing store, only found in L.A."

Okay, backstory: Last year, when Mark and I visited Jessica, we found this awesome store where I proceeded to buy almost everything. Ever since then, we've been all, Man, if only they had that store on the east coast and What a unique find! Ummm, turns out the store's name is XXI...followed by Forever. Jessica and I finally put together that the store we've been lusting after is a friggin' Forever 21. Which can be found at every mall in the United States. What did I say about my math skillz? I always struggled with roman numerals. Whatevs, I bought three dresses, a skirt and a shirt :)

We then had a light lunch of chopped salad and sweet potato fries (they put sea salt and cracked peppercorns on the fries! Incredible!) at the Roosevelt Hotel and then, naturally, headed to the Beverly Hills Hotel for a drink. After tossing the car keys to a valet, we proceeded to sip Bellinis on the veranda overlooking the hotel pool and cabanas. Basically, just another Saturday afternoon! So, so much fun. They even gave us marinated mozzarella cheese and spicy peanuts for free (well, as an accompaniment to our $20 drinks, I suppose). Then, just because it seemed like the right thing to do, we held an impromptu photo shoot in the hotel bathroom (which was bigger than my apartment, by the way) featuring us spinning, sitting on fancy chairs, and posing by the marble sinks. It was crazy, but classy, and was only interrupted by some old bag who clearly did not approve of our whimsical antics. Guess what? We didn't approve of hers either.

That night, after regrouping, we hit up the Geisha House for some of the BEST sushi either one of us has ever head. Ummm, surf and turf sushi anyone? No biggie, it only has lobster and Filet Mignon in it! Albacore tuna with jalapeno peppers sound good?! We were flipping out. We toasted (I had the Geisha's Dream cocktail and Jessica had champagne) and basically talked about how fancy we were... because talking about how fancy you are doesn't subtract from the fanciness. Everybody know that. We then bailed on the rest of Hollywood Blvd (skanks galore!) and hit up Chateau Marmont (sup Lohan?) and then The Saddle Ranch (sup Miranda and Girls Next Door?), where the trashiest girl I've ever seen proceeded to simulate sex atop the mechanical bull. I'm talking nasty skank ho, here. We're pretty sure she worked there and was supposed to get people interested in riding the bull, but all we were interested in was some sanitizer. I'm confident that the rest of the bar felt the same way too... she was only humored with a couple weak Yeahs and Woo-hoos before she slutted her way outside. Oh, L.A.!

The next day, we hit up a Farmer's Market which was absolutely fabulous!!! The artichokes were the size of my head, there were leafy greens for miles, the fruit was perfectly ripe and juicy... amazing. I kept trying to rationalize carting a giant bag of fruit and veggies across the country, but I just couldn't make it happen. Something else that I will never make happen again? Wheat grass shots. SICK. Jessica and I were not impressed. If I want that kind of flavor again, I'll go pick some grass in my backyard and throw it in the blender with a stick and water. To make myself feel better, I tried my first crepe (awesome!) and Jessica and I split a raw, veggie taco in a cabbage leaf (double awesome!)

We then hit up Venice Beach, laid in the sand and watched the freaks (ahem, performers), followed by a long drive along the water through... to... (ahh, Jessica help me out) where we took pictures of the beautiful view, chatted, drank coffee....basically the best time ever :) THEN, I had to pack to go home...not the best time ever.

After one last dinner (I had the best turkey burger...everyone go to Barneys in Santa Monica!), our weekend was over :( Jessica drove me to the airport, where I caught the red-eye to Boston (with one half-asleep layover in Indianapolis) and walked directly into work at 9:45. So, SO worth it. It's what celebrities do.

Moral of the Story: Jessica, I had the BEST time. Thank you for being the Hostess with the Mostess and I'm sorry I was cold the whole weekend. I also never, ever want to see the Joker or Sponge Bob again. EVER. Also... I LOVE L.A!!!!!!!!!!